Just when you thought awards season had finally ended, another set of trophies is about to be handed out: the Darwin Awards. Named after Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards recognize those whose less-than-intelligent actions revealed them to be unfit to reproduce, forcing nature to take up the task of removing them from the gene pool. The world is a dangerous place, and many dumb people are waltzing around in it without a clue or a seatbelt.
Though undoubtedly all victims of tragedy, these people complicated their legacies by going in ways most other people could reasonably avoid. Thus, you walk away from them feeling that perhaps this was all part of natural selection. Apparently, common sense is not all that common, and you, dear reader, should be happy yours has kept you around for this latest round of Darwin Awards.
A 31-year-old man in Navi Mumbai decided after rescuing a cobra that it would be a good idea to kiss the poisonous snake on the head, which subsequently bit and killed him. Now, many children don’t even like to get a peck on the head from their grandmother, so what makes you think this reptile would be any different? You literally only just met and then tried to lay one on them; that’s not just a faux-pas, it’s fatal.
Karma came for this Darwin Award winner, who died after getting her arm stuck in a donation box. The 56-year-old woman, who had reportedly done this before, drove her Hummer to the box in the middle of the night to rummage through the box. Strange to think a Hummer owner would be in such dire need of clothing. But then again, those things are costly gas-guzzlers, which should have already warned you this woman wasn’t all that evolved to begin with.
A renowned gamer died in the midst of playing a 24-hour videogame marathon for charity. Brian Vigneault had been at the game 22 hours when he left his live-stream for a smoke, and subsequently suffered a heart attack. While it’s touching Vigneault, 35, undertook this marathon for a good cause, he demonstrated bad judgment when swearing off sleep using a combination of 5-hour ENERGY, Red Bull, and coffee.